The morning started off pretty good. O-man went 8 hrs without a feeding overnight & I even got a shower in! But then Smith Magenis Syndrome hit in full force before we even left the house. I was drying my hair & that’s NOT what Scarlet wanted me to do. I continued anyways. I can’t let SMS completely rule our lives. I finished, we all got in the car to go to school, and the rage continued—kicking, screaming, hitting, etc, etc, etc, on and on and on for a good 20 minutes give or take (this is a long time for her). Oh, and I forgot to mention the biting. I took a good one from my nearly-four-year-old “special” little girl. OUCH!
After school wasn’t much better for her (she’s probably not feeling the best, maybe getting sick?)…a fit about the TV was redirected to making snakes with play-doh (which I hope is helping her sensory-wise to not feel the need to stick her hands in her dirty diapers, but that’s another story…). But then out of nowhere came a bite to her baby brother—6 weeks old, I might add. 😦 Poor baby did the silent-open-mouthed-face-gets-red-before-screaming bit. And this is the third time it has happened, all with me sitting right there beside him. This time, I cried, too. How can I protect my children from the wrath of SMS?
And then I thought about something that happened yesterday. After church, almost all of the attendees went out to eat at a shopping center food court. As he was leaving, our pastor asked about Scarlet since she didn’t come with us. I told him that she was having a hard time & he replied that we’ve got to pray and God can heal her. And I thought to myself, “Oh, he hasn’t heard about her syndrome…” and I wanted to tell him, but it wasn’t the time. But then I thought some more & realized that I’ve never prayed for her behavior. I’ve just accepted that this is the way it is & the way it’s going to be.
Friday, Japan was hit with a major earthquake & tsunami. As I watched the footage that night, all I could think about was God’s power. “Savior, He can move the mountains.” Saturday’s small group & Sunday’s sermon was on John 8:1-11—Jesus forgave the woman who was caught in adultery. “He is mighty to save.” This all reminded me that God can do anything and just because I don’t think He will ‘cure’ Scarlet doesn’t mean He can’t. And it doesn’t mean I shouldn’t even pray for her at all.
Since I’ve come to terms with her diagnosis, then that’s just it—I’ve come to terms with the fact that we will have days like today where her behavior is out of control. We will have numerous trips to various doctors. We will have a much different approach to her education than her siblings. But the least I can do is pray for her. Pray that she will skip some of the SMS inevitables. Pray that she will do many of the “normal” things that I’ve just accepted she won’t do. I’m actually quite ashamed that I haven’t yet prayed for her in this way. Fortunately, it’s not too late. “So take me as you find me, all my fears and failures. Fill my life again.”
Same Same! Teacher, Game! 